Start with something you noticed, not a rehearsed line.

Pick one detail from their profile

For someone who likes coffee, try: “Hot or iced? I still haven’t been convinced by iced coffee.” For someone who likes games: “Which game do you always come back to?” The question is specific and gives a little context about you.

Do not turn an interest into a knowledge test. They do not need to prove how much they enjoy it or deliver a long answer immediately. One open question leaves room for a response at their own pace.

Make it a conversation, not an interview

Instead of asking three questions in a row, respond to their answer and share a short experience. If they like sunset photographs, you might say: “I always struggle to choose one photo out of twenty. Do you do that too?”

If replies are short, slow down. If there is no reply, leave space. Repeated “Where are you?” messages or demands to explain a delay create pressure; people use an app at different times.

Leave some questions for later

A phone number, exact location or private photograph is not a good first request. Begin with what the person has chosen to share and let them decide what else to disclose. Disagreeing about a song or game is no reason to insult someone.

On Solef, conversations begin through an accepted Home request or mutual acceptance in Loop. Once connected, use a shared interest as an opening without pressuring someone to continue.

Keep exploring

• Chat with new people
• Meet people & make friends
• Talk about your day